Crumbs From the Corner: Adventures in Woolgathering

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Special Meal



"A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles."
-Mignon McLaughlin

My Spouse flew to Europe recently and spent a week.
Too late, it dawned on him that something had been curious about the meals he had been served to and from his destinations.
Some time ago he had opted to say 'diabetic' on his preferred meal plan for flights; that way he avoided the excess of sugar found in usual airline food. Not only that, but he would get served first, the food would have less grease and there would be a little portion of fruit as well. The requirement went into the system and now any time he flies for work-related purposes this benefit happily and automatically presents itself.
This had worked perfectly well for all subsequent flights; except that on his way home from Europe Spouse remembered that the airline attendants had not given him a diabetic meal for any of the numerous parts of that particular trip. It occurred to him just as he boarded a flight in Iceland and prepared for the last leg of a long journey.
He wondered idly about it but determined that it was too late to make a fuss.
When the meal was finally served mid-flight Spouse unwrapped the hot package of food:
there was a long, breaded, golden-fried piece of chicken on a bed of special rice. Other passengers were soon tucking into the same thing. Forget the diabetic meal, thought Spouse in eagerness: this looks surprisingly delicious.
The aroma hit my hungry Spouse and he raised his fork to stab it into the delectable dish.
"Sir?"
Spouse looked upward.
The air stewardess said a name and asked if Spouse was he.
"That's me," he replied.
In her strong and fierce Nordic accent she cautioned with a shake of her head, "you have special meal! You have diabetic meal!"
Spouse glanced down and the food had vanished, snatched away by an Icelandic eagle before he had so much as a moment to blink. At the most inopportune moment of all they had remembered and decided to present Spouse with the diabetic meal.
The superb standard meal was immediately replaced with a similar-sized portion of boiled vegetables and colourless, bland, boiled chicken.
Oh, the joys.

12 comments:

polona said...

that was a lousy swap by any standard...

Courtney said...

oh, how funny. I've heard of people marking similar choices...ie, kosher, celiac, whatever,on a plane, for the health benefits. For such a plane ride it must be at once discouraging to have yummy food taken away and wonderful an airline still, in this day and age, pays attention to such things...

Paul Merrill said...

Ah well, you can't win all the time!

Jaime said...

As I was reading the beginning of this post I thought to myself, hmmm what a great way to get a healthier meal...maybe I should claim to be diabetic. Less grease...good.

Then I kept reading...

hele said...

Oi, that is bad luck. But funny as well.

Beth said...

poor Spouse, he should be comforted in the fact that that chicken probably didn't taste nearly as good as it smelled.

The Texican said...

Just one more reason to drive or sail, the food served on airlines. It is almost as distasteful as the service you recieve these days. :)

TheElementary said...

Polona, it was indeed. And it's rare that he'd admire plane food.

Courtney, it was good they remembered, in a way. They were very sorry they'd forgotten. They take it seriously, which is a good thing.

Paul, Too true- that would be nice, though!

Jaime, Usually it works ;) honestly. He does get headaches if he doesn't eat on time, and lightheaded, so I suppose it is a health issue.

Hele, it was the way he did her accent and her 'power' that was funny- she was determined to fix the matter. Which is her job, of course.

Beth, I'd like to think so too but he described it and...well, I'm not so sure it didn't taste good too. We have to hope it was awful ;)

Texican, welcome back!
Nowadays we bring our own food. Except when Spouse is flying for work- he can't really do that then. I too would travel by car before flying now though.

mouse (aka kimy) said...

poor spouse. but the story made me smile, so lucky us!

TheElementary said...

Kimy, Spouse does make sacrifices for the good of comedy and humanity ;)

tangobaby said...

OMG, that really cracked me up. Poor Spouse.

TheElementary said...

Tangobaby, I appreciate your sympathy /laughter ;)
Yes: poor Spouse. Poor hungry Spouse.

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